I recently found this in the loft: It's my 1997/98 manager’s player of the year award for Barming Youth FC. The thing is, I was never really interested in football as a kid, despite my dad’s efforts to get me involved.
That all changed in the summer of 1990, the year of the World Cup - Italia ’90, probably the last time football was pure and unaffected. From that point, I was hooked, playing football (well, trying to...) at every opportunity. I was never particularly good at football, but what I lacked in natural ability I made up for in pace and effort!
At the age of 13, I decided to join a local team - Coxheath & Farleigh, and remained there for the next two years. Unfortunately, game time was limited, probably due to the fact that I was about four or five years behind everyone else.
I continued to work hard, at the playing field most nights after school and on weekends. I was hooked!
One day, my friend Paul Pharo said, “You should come and play for Barming Youth.” Paul had recently signed for them and was loving it. At first, I thought, “No, I’m not good enough,” but then I thought, “What have you got to lose?” Paul introduced me to Stuart Ansell (the manager’s son), who took me along for a couple of training sessions, and the rest is history, as they say!
At 15, I joined Barming Youth FC, where I met my new manager, Steve Ansell. I remember Steve asking me one day, “What position do you play?” I said, “I don’t know,” and that was the truth; I’d never really been given a position. Steve said, “Okay, let’s try a few positions out and see how you get on.” Steve was great like that, making you feel relaxed and at ease. I played up front, center midfield, right wing, and left wing, but none of them particularly worked, probably because of my lack of experience and understanding of the game.
One day, Steve said, “How about right back?” I said, “Okay then.” I really didn’t have a clue; I just wanted to play. Steve said, “Yeah, let’s try it. This will be a good way to utilize your speed.” This excited me. One thing I knew I had was pace, but I just needed to use it in the right way.
All of a sudden, I was getting game time, five minutes here, ten minutes there. Steve was always fair; he made sure everyone got to play, regardless of ability, and I’ll never forget that.
That’s true in all walks of life! How can we grow and improve without people giving us opportunities and encouraging us? 🤷🏼♂️
So that was it. I became a right back. Maybe not the most glamorous of positions, but I loved it, bursting down the wing at every opportunity and whipping in crosses, then sprinting back when I realized I was out of position. After a couple of seasons of being something of a super sub, I managed to secure a regular spot in the starting 11. At the end of the 1997/98 season, I won Manager’s Player, something I’m still very proud of. From the kid not interested in football and playing catch-up for many years, I’d finally done it.
So, what happened next? More trophies? More football? No, I STOPPED and never played 11-a-side again. I can’t quite remember why I stopped; perhaps going out drinking seemed more fun at the time. I was only 20 and playing the best football ever. I still regret this decision today.
My mates kept trying to encourage me back, but I was having none of it. Maybe there was a sense that I’d achieved what I wanted to achieve? But I don’t really believe that. I think I just got caught up in a moment and then felt it was too late to go back.
I’m okay with having regrets. We all have them, right? It’s just how you process them and move forward. Then sometimes life gives you a second chance!
When we started DadSpace nearly three years ago, I never thought football would be part of it, let alone playing 11-a-side again. So when the opportunity came up to put a DadSpace team together for a charity match, I had to make it happen.
At the age of 45 (25 years after my last game), I walked out onto the pitch in front of my friends and family. Our team was a mix of players from my Barming Youth days and the Fathers who attend our DadSpace sessions. To top it all off, we had Stuart Ansell as our manager (following in his dad’s footsteps) and his number two, well, it could only be one man… my old manager Steve Ansell.
It was an evening I will never forget, the feeling of pride, nostalgia, and of course, Brotherly Support Between Fathers!
Life is short, so if you get a second chance to do something you love, grab it with both hands.
Thank you for the memories, Barming Youth. Thanks for giving me the opportunity, Steve Ansell, and thank you, DadSpace, for making it all happen again!
This article was submitted by Denver King - Director of DadSpace.
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